Pam's Story

I have like many others of us been in total shock and disbelief since the spending review.

I was born disabled with hemiplegia,went to a mainstream school [after my parents fought for a place] left school with 'o' and c.s.e levels.was only out of work a day in 1979 [time of recession] and worked fulltime for a stationers.seven months later I was made redundant.

I then got on a work experience course for 9 months with day-release.

Seven months later I was an invoice clerk full-time[the D.H.S.S] paid the company £40 for 6 weeks to give me a chance. I stayed there for 5 years and then went to work full-time for the civil service for the next 19 years.

I was dismissed with a lump sum due to my failing health. No pension.

Four years down the line I feel as if times turned back. I was told by the civil service Dr. I would never work again. Now to cap it all I will not get ESA.

You see my fault was I didn't want to take money from the taxpaper, so I bought my own terraced house and saved. I could cry now thinking my work collegues said it was a waste of time saving and you know what.sometimes I deprived myself of neccessities to save. I have never smoked or drank. I cannot drive because of epilepsy. My health has deterioted over the years with additional disabilities.

Life has always been a fight for me and at times my body feels so exhausted. To me the government are treating us as in past times, ie are we going to end up begging. Because we are disabled 99% of us through no fault of our own. Isn't life a struggle enough.

Yes I would work part-time if a job could be found, but my specialist said I shouldn't do repetative duties. Does that include feeding myself! .It taken me ages to do this e-mail and I have pain in my good arm!

I have denegeration of the spine and walking is painful so even being a dinner lady for example could hurt.

I sit here not trying to think of the future. It's all too painful.

Thanks for listening